Irregular Days

Note:  This story is fantasy.  I am not sure if I have to say that every time, but for some of the more stupid people out there:  this is a fantasy.  If you are offended by sex, spanking, punishment, or anything that Miss Manners wouldn’t approve of, leave.  It’s also a little harsh and raw. Otherwise, enjoy! And let me know what you think.  -K


In the morning, I have to be by the bed, kneeling and waiting.  When he wakes up, sometimes I have to suck his cock before he gets up.  Most of the time, though, I stay kneeling until he gets into the shower and calls for me.  In the shower, I either have to go down on him or he pushes me against the wall and fucks me.  The water always gets into my eyes and burns and sometimes the floor is slippery. 

I have to follow a specific routine in the shower.  If I have to suck him, I get on my knees with my hands behind my back.  If I don’t do a good job, he will grab my hair and force himself into my mouth and make me gag.  Sometimes he will slap my face with his hand or cock and make me start over.  If I move my hands to steady myself from falling over, I get a big punishment when the shower is over.  But if I do a good job and make him happy, he cums in the shower and lets me take a shower after he is finished.  If I mess up really bad, he will finish his shower, turn the water off, and make me lie down in the tub with my arms over my head.  Then he will cum all over my body.  Sometimes, if he is really mad, he will piss on me too.  I have to lie there until he tells me to move afterward, and on those days if I am not in school I am not allowed to get dressed.  If I do have school, I have to get dressed without washing.  He will say “You can  smell like a nasty whore all day until you learn.”

After breakfast, I get a spanking.  I usually get it in my bedroom with a hairbrush.  I have a special chair for my morning spankings that I sometimes have to bend over or kneel in.  Sometimes I go over his knee for my morning spanking. 

If I have done something wrong that morning, like in the shower or not being ready on time, I get what he calls “a taste of tonight.” That means I get five licks from whatever I will get punished with that night.  If I have a very bad morning, it might be more than one thing.  Once, I disobeyed him twice in the shower and I was late to get downstairs.  I got five licks of his belt, the paddle, and the cane.  That night, I got the rest of my punishment and it was awful.

I get home from school before him, so I have to do my homework and tidy up the house before he gets home.  If he finds something out of place or my homework is sloppy, I will get a punishment.  If I try to explain or make an excuse, I will get double, so I try to do everything right the first time.

My punishments always happen after dinner.  I have ten minutes to go to my room and get ready.  I have to be washed and clean-shaven on my legs, underarms, and pussy.  At the end of the ten minutes, I have to be on my knees next to the couch, waiting with my hands behind my back.

I have to ask for my punishments.  I have to say “I am so sorry for (whatever I did).  Please punish me.”  Then I have to unzip his pants and lick his balls and suck his cock until he is hard. 

I get punished in a lot of different ways.  I may get the belt on my ass or my breasts or my pussy.  I may have to stand up with my legs open and my hands behind my head in the middle of the room and get flogged or whipped.  Sometimes I have to hold an object in my ass while I am spanked and if I let go, the whole punishment starts again.  I have many different punishments, but that is a story for another time.   I can tell you that when I get punished, if I move out of position or speak without permission or anything like that, the whole punishment starts over, even if I standing in the corner at the very end!  I don’t like these punishments, but no matter how bad they are, I usually get all tingly and sometimes I even get wet.

After I get my punishment, I might have to stand in the corner for a while.  Sometimes I have to kneel on all fours in the middle of the room with my ass in the air.  After that I have to say, “Thank you for my punishment.”  Then I have to take his cock in my hand and rub it until it is hard again.  When it is hard, I have to say “I am sorry that you had to punish me again.  Please fuck me so that you can have some pleasure after punishing me.”

After that, he fucks me however he wants.  Sometimes it in my ass, sometimes I have to get on top, or sometimes I have to bend over the couch.  Whenever he fucks me he always spanks my ass with his hand, no matter how hard my punishment has been.  Right before he cums, he always stops and makes me lie down on the floor. He checks to see how wet I am.  I have to touch myself and get myself off.  If I am really wet, he might take his belt off and spank my breasts while I am doing this.  I try not to get wet but I just can’t help it sometimes.   This makes me even wetter and I have to wait until he tells me to cum.  I am not allowed to ask to cum and if I cum without permission…it’s very, very bad.  I have only done it once, and I will never do it again.  Once I cum, he cums too, all over my body and face.   I have to lie very still. 

After that, I have to lie there until he tells me to move.  I might have to go kneel next to the couch or he might send me away to bed alltogether.  Sometimes, I have to lie there all night until the next morning when he calls for me. 

That’s a normal day for me, but sometimes his friends come over on the weekends, and it’s a completely different type of weekend.  When my parents are home, it’s only for a few days at a time, and those days, it’s different too.  No matter who is there, I know that my step-brother is still really the one in charge and I still get punishments and fuckings in my bedroom or his.

Psycho K

My disclaimer:  If you are under 18, you need to leave.  If you don’t like stories about spanking, then please leave.  If you are a close-minded idiot, then please leave.  This story is not true or based on any truth that I have known in my life.  If it happens to somehow offend you, then get over it or move onto another place.  Pleasant and constructive comments, however, are always welcome.  -K


K knelt in a corner, straining her ears to hear any movement behind her.  Hearing only silence, she sighed.  Irrational K had made an appearance earlier, and as she transformed into psycho mode, she mentally prepared herself for the argument would commence.  Usually when K became crazy, they would toss petty insults and hurtful words at one another until one of them caved in.  The fights never lasted very long, but they were emotionally and physically draining.  This time, however, was different.  Without a word, H had simply grabbed her wrist, led her to this corner, and made her kneel. 

When H did this, K was cut off in the middle off her sentence and allowed herself to be led to a corner, more out of disbelief than anything else.  As she heard H walk back into the kitchen, a wave of shame, fear, and confusion washed over her.  Fuck, she thought.  Now what?

In the kitchen, H continued cooking dinner and thought about what to do with her cute little psycho.  Many moons ago, they had agreed that H would be the head of the household and that K would submit to her.  H had it good with K.  The girl was sexy, smart, and intelligent.  They rarely fought.  And although H had the authority to punish her, she never really had to.  She never did anything really wrong.  She wasn’t the kind of girl to stay out all night and party or to drink and drive or anything like that.  And even though H had caught her lying a few times early on in their relationship, K had since grown up and become much more responsible. 

That doesn’t mean that H never punished her, however.  Once, after a few days of having a particularly nasty attitude, H had spanked her with a ruler until K begged her to stop.  But punishments were few and far between, and they were happy together.  Except for when K went psycho on her. 

Usually when this happened, H completely lost her temper and the situation would snowball until someone, usually H, broke down and apologized.  Tonight, however, something had snapped.  H had lost her temper so badly that she couldn’t even speak.  As she waited for the water on the stove to boil, she sighed. 

Just because H didn’t have to punish K very often didn’t mean they didn’t both enjoy spankings.  In fact, they were a frequent part of their nighttime trysts.  H could make K writhe in agony and beg for more with a simple hand spanking.  She could turn her into the most submissive slut willing to do anything for her Daddy with her belt.  H had the power to make K completely melt with just the teeniest hint of dominance or force.  H loved that power and control. 

As H thought about this, she remembered what her original plans for the night would be.  They were going to enjoy dinner together, play some video games, and enjoy a little overdue playtime in their bedroom.  But one offhand comment about H’s mother coming over, and K went crazy.  And H was plain tired of it.  Why should her plans be ruined because her girlfriend lost her temper?  She knew that even though K never did anything wrong to be punished for, this attitude and disrespect that she had thrown at H tonight warranted something.

H sighed.  She hated this.  She didn’t want to do this.  In fact, it felt almost like a chore.  But somewhere deep down, she knew that K was pushing and pushing and pushing her for a reason, waiting for a reaction.  And this time, H wasn’t going to be the one apologizing.  Hell no.  And she was still going to get what she wanted tonight, fight or no fight. 

Back in her corner, K’s anger quickly turned to sadness.  She hated herself for getting like this, but for some reason, when she felt that little monster welling up inside of her, she just couldn’t make him go away.  She started to fidget in her corner.  H had never put her in a corner like that, without speaking to her or arguing with her.  The silence made her miserable.  K couldn’t stand the silence and the not knowing what would happen. 

She wondered what H was thinking.  She wondered if they would still be able to enjoy their night.  She felt guilty for ruining their making dinner together time.  Above all, she was fearful.  She knew H would never leave her, no matter what she did.  Did K sometimes take advantage of that and push H too far?

After about ten minutes, K heard the oven door close.  Her body stiffened as she felt H behind her.  Grabbing her by the arm, H guided her to the couch and sat down, Placing K over her lap in one swift move. 

K couldn’t believe what was happening.  She never got punished and she liked it that way!  Even though she read stories and watched videos, when it came right down to it, she was terrified.  H was strong and hot and had the best forearms ever.  She could do some serious damage if she tried.  K seriously couldn’t believe this was happening.  Could she back out?

K wiggled a little bit to test her movement.  H wasn’t holding her very tightly, but as soon as K tried to move, she felt H’s hand slap her ass, hard.  Once, twice, three…she lost count of how many times.  She was wearing jeans, so she wasn’t in too much pain, but she was humiliated to be draped over her Daddy’s lap like a little girl.  She really wanted to speak up and argue that H was being ridiculous, but she lost her voice.  H still had not spoken to her and she could feel the anger radiating from H’s body.  In less than a minute, it was over, and K felt glad.  It hadn’t been bad at all.  K always got over things quickly and was ready to resume their evening.  H, however, was still angry and had a ways to go. 

H sat K down on the couch next to her.  She had still not said anything since the corner incident and K was going insane from the cold silence.  It had brought tears to her eyes while she was in the corner, but she had quickly swallowed them back down. 

“Look at me.”  K jumped slightly at these words.  Immediately she felt tears coming up again.  She could hear the anger and disappointment in H’s voice.  She felt about three inches tall.  She slowly raised her eyes up to look at H. God, she was so freaking cute.  Her hair fell in front of her eyes all messed up and sexy.  Her eyes were so blue and so intense that the look in them alone made K feel submissive.  A fire burned in the back of those eyes and K immediately knew that she would do whatever she was told.  H was too angry to push any further this time.  “Do you understand why you are being punished?”  K nodded.  “Tell me.”

This sucked.  K could never look Heather in the eyes when talking about punishment or spankings, whether they were sexual or not.  It was too hard.  She just couldn’t do it.  As she started to speak her eyes dropped back down.  H lifted her chin up until her eyes met hers again. 

H knew this was hard for K, and she secretly enjoyed it.  K was completely under control and she loved it.  The punishment part wasn’t fun, but she knew K needed it to feel not guilty and it turned H on even though it was for punishment.  H would make sure that K would take care of that later.

“IgotanattitudeandIwasmeantoyou.” K said this all very fast and jumbled and it took a second for H to process it.  She knew how hard this was for K to admit though, and decided not to push her too far, especially since this was the first time she had been punished in a while. 

“You have to stay calm with me.  We can discuss issues if you have them, but when you lose your temper and start slamming things around and not answering me when I talk to you, I get very frustrated.  Do you understand?”

K nodded again.  She felt like a kindergartener.  She shrank another inch. 

H noted this.  If they had to repeat this again, she would make K talk to her more, but the dinner was in the oven and she really wanted to enjoy their night, so she just said, “Go get my belt.” K’s eyes widened and her face reddened.  She smiled, but in disbelief.  She thought H was joking.  She had just been spanked.  It was over!  She looked at H and saw that H was not smiling.  In fact, she still looked pretty pissed.  K got up slowly and walked upstairs, starting to regret her actions of earlier.

H smiled as she watched K walk away.  That incredulous look on her face was cute.  But she couldn’t melt now.  She had to finish.  That light spanking was nothing.  These psycho incidents had to stop.

K came back downstairs and handed H the belt.  Her head was hung in shame.  “Take off your jeans.”  K obeyed slowly, feeling like her hands and legs were made of lead.  She was humiliated.  In the back of her mind, she wondered if the curtains were closed. 

H stood up and bent K over the couch.  “You will not disrespect me, curse at me, or slam things around in anger.  Do you understand?”  With that, she swung the belt across K’s ass, hard.  It landed right in the middle of it and left an angry red mark.  K gasped.  H had never used the belt on her for punishment.  It hurt so freaking bad.  “Yes, Daddy,” she said.

H liked that.  K had immediately started calling her Daddy as a sign of submission.  But her punishment was far from over.  “You will not have a bad attitude.”  H slapped the belt across her ass again, harder.  She wanted K to remember this punishment for a long time.  

“I’m sorry, Daddy.” K had wiggled a bit after that second stroke.  Surely it was almost over?

“And most of all, when I ask you a question, you had better answer me.” H swung again and again, five more times across K’s ass, which was rapidly becoming bright red. 

“Yes, Daddy, I’m so sorry!”  At that, H finished her lecture and simply starting laying it on K’s ass.  Over and over H swung, focusing on her ass the thighs.  K wiggled and turned but she never stood up .  She was too scared of what H would do if she got out of her position.  There were worse things than a belt, she knew.

Noticing K’s discomfort, H paused to let the sting settle.  She had read somewhere that pausing made the next licks hurt worse AND it was supposed to create more arousal.  The arousal would come later.  She was focused on punishment right now.  After K caught her breath, she brought the belt down again.  K screamed into a pillow.  Okay, please Daddy, stop!  I am so sorry for being mean.  Please Daddy, please! 

H didn’t stop.  She had a plan.  She ignored K and kept whipping her with the belt.  K’s pleas and cries hurt her, but she kept at it.  After about 15 or 20 strokes, she heard it.  A sniffle.  Was her little psycho crying?  She brought the belt down again, right below her ass and above her thighs.  At that, the floodgates opened.  K started sobbing and crying like a little girl.  H appraised her ass.  It was bright red, and little welts had begun to appear.  She had finally broken down K.  Now maybe next time her little psycho side acted up, she would remember this.

H wanted to throw the belt down then and there and hug K and tell her everything was okay.  H’s anger had melted away right after she started spanking her.  It was a good way to get rid of that tension and mad feeling, she thought.  But she knew that K needed just a little more.  Three more, she thought to herself.  Three more times, H brought the belt down right in the middle of K’s ass.  She swung as hard as she could and K wailed and kicked her legs after every stroke.  Her sobs seemed to be coming from a very deep place.  After the last stroke, H lifted K up gently and set her on the couch.  She held onto her tight and kissed her head.  “Ssh.  It’s okay.  It’s over, baby.  You were such a good girl for Daddy taking your punishment.  Stop crying.”

After a few minutes of soothing talking, K buried her head into her Daddy’s chest.  With a very muffled voice, she said “Thank you so much, Daddy,” and a wave of fresh sobs welled up.  H kissed her again.  “You’re welcome, my little girl.”

When all of this was said and done, K felt much better.  Psycho K was long gone, and H was no longer angry.  With their fight forgotten, they enjoyed their dinner and played video games together.  While waiting for a scene to load, H caught K in a yawn.  “You’re not tired, are you baby?” she asked. 

“Oh, no,” K said, and yawned again.  At that, H turned off the Xbox and set down the controller.  She gave K an evil smile.  “You know you were punished earlier, right?” K blushed and hung her head.  Her bottom was still burning, and a few welts were still there.  “Yes.”

“Well, now you have to thank Daddy for your punishment.”  H took K by the hand and led her upstairs.  “Kneel.”  K quickly obeyed and started licking H’s pussy frantically.  She wanted to do whatever she could to let her Daddy know how thankful she was for her punishment. 

H grabbed her hair roughly and held it in her pussy.  Then she pulled her up by her hair and steered her toward the bed.  “Get on your hands and knees.”  K looked at H with her mouth open.  “What?”  That’s what H told her to do when she wanted to whip her with a belt during sex.  But she had just gotten punished!  Was she serious?

“Do it, “H said and pushed her roughly onto the bed.  K got on all fours and lifted her ass up into the air.  “You were punished earlier, little girl, but this is not for punishment.  This is to get your little cunt wet and ready for your Daddy.  This is for your pleasure.”  She was right.  As K felt that familiar slap against her ass, an entirely different emotion was coursing through her veins.  It was a raw, base, sexual energy that made her lift her ass up and ask for more.  “Oh, yes Daddy, more.”

H swung a few more times and then K began to move.  H wasn’t having that tonight.  Tonight was all hers.  K was hers.  She pushed her down and held her there and she spanked her again with the belt.  “Move again, and I’ll go get something worse,” she whispered in K’s ear. 

K became instantly wet at these words and gasped as the belt struck her again.  After a few more times, H made K turn over and lie on her back.  She spanked K’s tits and made her moan and writhe around on the bed.  “Such a whore, my little girl.” 

“Yes Daddy.” 

“Open your legs, little whore.”  K immediately open her legs and felt a sharp smack.  Damnit!  She hated this and she knew H did it just to prove her control over her.  She closed her legs instinctively.  H pushed them apart roughly.  “Keep them open until I tell you to close them, or I’ll use my belt instead of my hand right here.”  K moaned at these words and H’s voice and kept her legs open.  She had no desire to actually feel a belt on her pussy, but the mere threat was enough to double the wetness that was already there between her legs.  H slapped her pussy several times and let out an evil chuckle.  She knew K hated this part.  She loved watching her submit. 

After she stopped slapping her pussy, she waited.  She wanted K to mess up, to disobey, just so she’d have a chance to roughly punish her before her fucking.  But K kept her legs open obediently.  That didn’t matter, H thought.  She could use her however she wanted anyway.  H had been turned on ever since dinner, when she saw how she had the power to turn her psycho K into an obedient little girl.  That was such a turn on. 

She grabbed K’s hair again.  “Fuck me.”  K immediately started fucking her and knew right where to go.  H began moaning in pleasure, keeping a good grip on K’s hair the whole time.  K rocked back and forth with H, pushing her fingers in as far as they would go, trying to touch all the right spots. 

K loved to fuck her Daddy.  She was good at it.  And her Daddy was so hot and powerful.  She couldn’t imagine being with anybody who could make her feel as safe and secure and loved as H had done tonight.  That was why it was important that she do such a good job fucking her daddy. 

Apparently she was doing a good job, because H was moaning and telling her that she fucked her Daddy really well and that she had to stop.  K didn’t want to.  Her Daddy felt so good inside and she loved bringing pleasure to her.  She kept fucking for a few more seconds, trying to bring her Daddy to orgasm when she felt a hand on her wrist.

“I told you to stop.”  Daddy kept holding her wrist and flipped her over, so that her hand was behind her back and she was on her stomach.  H slapped her ass a few times, hard and fast.  By now, the burning was not going away and K quickly began to wiggle away from H’s spanks.  “You didn’t listen to Daddy.”

“I just wanted to be a good girl Daddy!” 

“You didn’t listen.  Good girls listen to their daddies.”  With that, H put K’s hands over her head.  K understood that to mean not to move them.  “Bad girls who don’t listen get into trouble.” 

H rubbed K’s ass.  She was so turned on.  She could feel the heat from her ass from her punishments and spankings.  But H was not interested in spanking anymore.  She reached down between K’s thighs and let her juices soak her fingers.  “You’re such a wet little girl.  You didn’t listen to your daddy and you are a soaking wet slut.”

 “Yes daddy, I am,” K said breathlessly.  Every nerve in her body was on edge.  H was driving her fucking insane.  It was all she could do to keep her hands where they were supposed to be.  But she wouldn’t move them.  She really was a good little girl. 

H teased K’s pussy until her fingers were completely covered in her wetness.  Without warning, H moved her hand up and began to fuck K in the ass.  K went wild and began pushing her ass up onto Heather’s fingers.  “Oh, Daddy!  Oh, yes!”

“Bad little girls who don’t listen get their assess fucked.”  H fucked her ass hard and reached around to grab her tits while she was fucking her.  Her nipples were harder than ever and H played with them, torturing K even worse. 

K’s nerves were on such end that she was just moving her body every which way.  She knew that if she didn’t ask her Daddy to stop soon, she would come without permission.  She had done that once before and learned a very valuable lesson.  H had forced her to pleasure her daddy for three nights in a row after a very long and hot spanking.  Each night, H had spanked her and teased her and forced her to fuck her, but never reciprocated.  Her fingers never went anywhere near K’s pussy and she wasn’t allowed to touch herself.  When the fourth night came and H finally fucked her, K had to beg and beg for a good five minutes before being allowed to come all over H’s hands.  She had not forgotten that lesson since.  Not even for a minute. 

“Daddy, stop.  I am going wild.  Please let me fuck you.”  H didn’t listen and kept fucking her ass.  “Don’t you dare come, little girl.  I am nowhere near done with your ass or your pussy.”

K moaned and tried to breathe to keep herself from coming.  Just when she knew that she couldn’t take anymore, she felt H pull out of her ass and lay on her back.  “Fuck me again.”  At these words, K went ballistic.  As she fucked H, she sucked on her tits and H held her head while she did.  K greedily sucked on them, trying to drive her Daddy as crazy as she had driven her just moments before.  H moved back and forth in tune with K’s motions.  K fucked H as good as she could, getting faster and faster, feeling her muscles tighten.  She kept going harder and faster, sucking on her nipples until she heard H again say “Stop.”  This time, she listened, and as her reward H finally plunged her fingers deep inside K’s pussy.  “If you would have listened the first time, you could have already been fucked, little girl,” she said.  “Yes daddy, I am sorry.  I am being a good girl now,” K whispered.  She was completely lost.  She only knew half of what she was saying.  H’s fingers felt so good and she never wanted it to stop. 

She felt H’s other hand slapping her tits and started to moan louder.  She was trying so hard to be quiet, she knew that H didn’t like her to get too loud, but damnit, H made it so fucking hard to stay quiet!  “Fuck me daddy.  Fuck your little slut.”  How embarrassed she would be the next day, but in the moment, she was a horny little bitch who just wanted her daddy to fuck her brain out. 

“Yes, you are a little slut.  Who owns you?”

“My daddy does.  You own me, daddy!”  These words pushed K right over the edge, and H knew it.  She fucked her as hard as she could as she felt her little girl’s muscles tighten.  “Be a good girl and come on daddy’s fingers.”  H barely whispered these words into K’s ear and K exploded.  She screamed and writhed and thrusted and had one of the strongest orgasms ever.  Her burning ass, her earlier punishment, her second, for pleasure punishment, the fucking, and the dirtiness of herself made K have the longest, most intense orgasm ever.  She hoped that H knew it was all because of her.  

After K recovered, she immediately began fucking H.  H reached down and rubbed her clit as K fucked her.  She moaned gently and thrusted her hips up to meet K.  Before long, H came too, so strong and so hard that K had trouble keeping her fingers inside of H’s pussy.  H felt on top of the world: she had finally punished K like she should’ve done months ago; she had fucked her little girl good and reminded her who owned her, and she was getting the best fucking of her life.  As she reached a climax, she too, exploded and wrapped one arm around K.  As she came, K buried her body into H’s strong arms, feeling her forearms flexing beneath her.  Afterward, they both collapsed, H’s arms around K’s.  They had such strong orgasms that they didn’t wake up until the next morning.

“Hey, baby?” K said. She had an impish grin on her face.  “What do you want to do today?”

Pushed Too Far

My disclaimer:  If you are under 18, you need to leave.  If you don’t like stories about spanking, then please leave.  If you are a close-minded idiot, then please leave.  This story is not true or based on any truth that I have known in my life.  If it happens to somehow offend you, then get over it or move onto another place.  Pleasant and constructive comments, however, are always welcome.  -K
Note:  This was one of those stories that was moving faster in my brain that through my typing fingers, and I have not yet edited it.  It was also one of those stories that started out as something alltogether different than the way it ended.  These things may be reflected sylistically and grammatically.  Please watch out for errors, though I hope that they do not alter your reading enjoyment.  -K 
My parents never spanked us.  I don’t know where he gets it from. 
He is my brother, and we aren’t technically related.  My parents adopted both of us separately, but when they died my brother was 21 and he took over so I wouldn’t have to go to foster care.  I was 14 at the time.  I was a very stupid 14 year old, and after the initial shock and grief of losing my adoptive parents, became excited about having my brother as my guardian. No rules! 
And, for a while, there were none.  I came and went as I pleased, did what I wanted.  My brother did the same.  We rarely saw each other.  I got into trouble a few times at school, and I would sit and nod politely at the counselors and then at my brother at home, who gave me the speech about “knowing what I was going through” and such.  One night, I never came home.  My brother was furious and to me, he looked a little worried, even scared.  He sat me down and again talked to me.  At the end of the conversation he grounded me for two weeks.  I was feeling pretty guilty about that look on his face, so I went upstairs and stayed there for a few days. 
But the guilt quickly wore off, and when a group of my friends went to the mall one night to stalk a super-cute boy, I was there.  I didn’t even have to sneak out.  I walked out the front door. I half expected my brother to show up a tthe mall that night, but he didn’t.  When I came home, he never noticed I had been gone.  And so, I came to learn how to “get-away” with things.  I got into more trouble ,stayed out later, smoked, drank, and all those things that stupid kids do.  I noticed my brother desparately trying to control me during that time, but I didn’t care.  I was having fun.  So much fun.
When I was 15, everything changed.  I stumbled in the front door very late and very drunk on a school night, and my brother was there waiting for me. 
“Where in the hell have you been?” His voice was so cold, I shivered, despite the warm fuzzy effects of the tequila.  I didn’t answer him. It was silent for a few moments. It made me uncormfortable.  I started to walk toward the stairs, and did a terrible job of walking like a sober person.  I tried to focus on the stairs and getting up them.  Suddenly, I felt his hand on my arm.  He grabbed it tightly.  “I am trying very hard to keep my cool,” he said, “so you need to answer my question.”
I knew that this was one of those important moments, but the teenager in me couldn’t resist. “None of your business.”  As soon as it was out, I knew I had slurred badly, but it was still comprehensible. And in that split second, he slapped my face so hard that I seemed to sober up. It stung and I felt blood rushing to my cheek. I looked at his face, searching, but his eyes were cold and hard.  “Where?” He asked the question again, his voice steady.
“A friend’s house,” I said.  I may have still been slurring, but I was mentally aware that this was going to end badly and tried to focus on getting out of the situation.
“Who drove you home?”  His hand was still on my arm, and I could feel his anger.  “I took a cab.  I swear,” I said.
He looked at me for a moment and steered me to the couch.  He sat down and pulled me down next to him. He took a deep breath and then sighed.  As I watched him anxiously, I noticed that my big brother had grown up a lot in the year since my parents died.  He looked so much older than 22. His hair was messed up and his face was tired, but his eyes burned with a blue/gray intensity that I had never bothered to notice before.  Maybe it was the alcohol, but he was even pretty cute. 
He started to speak and my attention snapped back to his voice.  “I am tired of worrying about you, Andrea.  I just spent four hours trying to track you down, only to have you come in drunk, dishelved, and who knows what else.”
“I–” I tried to speak, but he held up his hand and stopped me.  “Don’t say anything.  You listen.  This is not the first night I’ve spent wondering where you are.  I am tired of talking to you.  It’s not doing any good.  Some of my friends are telling me to put you into foster care.”
Tears prickled my eyes.  I dreaded what he would say next.  “I’m not going to do that.  You’re my sister.  We are going to handle things differently from now on.”  Relief flooded me.  But wait, what?  Differently?  I sat silently and waited.
“When you do something wrong, I am going to spank you.”  I inhaled sharply.  He ignored me and contnued talking. “As far as I can tell, tonight, you came home drunk, you are out way too late, you disrespected me, and you lied to me about where you were.  I called your friends.  You weren’t there.”
The whole time he was talking, my heart sank lower and lower.  I didn’t even know what to say.  I just sat there, drunk and stunned.  How had things gone so wrong in less than five minutes?  What the hell did he mean by spanking?  How could I talk myself out of this terrible mess?  “Chris, I–“
“I’m not finished talking.  Do not interrupt me again.  You don’t have a choice here.  This is how it is going to be.  I am your guardian.  Now, if you would like to go to social services and tell them that I am not fit to be a guardian, that is fine.  I can drive you there myself.  But for you to stay here, in this house, with me, you do not have a choice in the situation. Do you understand?
I felt a short stab in my heart.  I loved my brother.  How could he ever think that I’d leave him?  Besides, I could never go back to foster care.  Never.  I nodded.
He studied me carefully for a moment.  “Go to bed.  We will take care of this tomorrow.”
At this point, I burst into tears.  “Please, don’t,” I sobbed.  “Please don’t make me wait.”
He got off the couch.  “I am too pissed to deal with you any more tonight.  You are drunk out of your mind.  Go to bed.  Now.”  He voice was ice cold and clear.  He had never spoken to me like that before.  I walked out of the room and walked up the stairs.  I fell into bed with my clothes on and cried harder than I have ever cried before.  It was like I couldn’t stop.  He was so disappointed in me, I could feel it radiating from him.  Maybe he didn’t love me anymore.  I made his life so much harder just by being here, and then even harder by not being a good kid.  If I kept up, he was going to end up hating me.  I finally either passed out or fell asleep.
The next morning, surprisingly, I didn’t have a hangover.  I guess I had built up a tolerance to the alcohol.  What I did have, however, was this feeling of unease.  Chris fixed me breakfast, and sat down at the table without a word.  He didn’t eat.  I wanted to be stoic and not eat too, but I was starving.  I felt him watching me the whole time.  After I finished, he got up started to clear the dishes.  As he did, he said, “You need to go into the living room, find a corner, and kneel there until I come in there to get you.” 
This caught me by total surprise.  “What do you mean?” I asked.  He didn’t answer, he just continued to clean the kitchen.  I sat and waitied for him to say something, but he didn’t.  I was really confused by this.  “I’m not a little girl, Chris.  I don’t need to stand in a corner.” He stopped what he was doing and looked at me.  I stood up and glared at him. 
Finally, he broke our staring war.  “No choices.”  He went back to what he was doing and ignored me.  The conversation of last night came back to me in a flood of emotions and I slowly went to the living room.  I was humiliated.  I could hearing water running, the dishwasher being opened and closed, and the clink of glasses.  My knees started to hurt and I shifted my weight a little.  I kept reminding myself that this was probably only a one-time thing.  Once he got it out of his system, things could go back to normal.
Finally, I heard him walk in.  Was I supposed to turn around?  “Stand up and come here,” he said.  I guess not. 
I walked over to him and stoof in front of him.  He was sitting on an oversized chair that I had slept in before on night when I got home late.  I would turn on the television and make it look like I fell asleep watching TV so he wouldn’t know I was out so late.  I guess I never fooled him. 
“I don’t have much else more to say than what I said last night.  I am tired of worrying about you and this is my solution.  Do you have any questions?”  I shook my head. 
“All right then.  First, you came in way too late for a fifteen-year-old girl.”  Suddenly, in one motion, I found myself over his lap and staring at the hardwood floor.  Without warning, I felt his hand come down on my ass.  Over and over again.  It stung, but I had my jeans on.  I was determined not to let this get to me.  After about a minute, though, it started to sting and I started to wriggle.  When I wriggled, he stopped.  “Stand up.”
It was over!  That wasn’t bad at all.  I stood up and adjusted my clothes.  “I’m so sorry,” I said, “and I promise to be on time–” He held up his hand.  “Do you think we are finished?  We haven’t even started.  Take down your jeans.”
This was too much.  “What?”  I yelled.  “No fucking way! You didn’t mention any of this last night!”  I wasn’t even halfway through my sentence when I felt myself turned upside down and I felt my jeans being pulled down.  How the hell had he done that without unbuttoning them?  I felt a flurry of spanks rain down over my panties and it was starting to tingle and burn.  “Okay, I’m sorry.  I’m sorry,”I said. 
“You have no choices.  You are out of chances.  Everytime you talk back to me, you are making it worse.”  He was emphasizing his words with spanks.  “I am not going to let my little sister run around town getting into trouble.  I will take care of it.”  I felt him pull down my panties.  It was getting harder for me to breathe evenly.  “No!”  I fought him for my underwear, kicking and squirming, but he got them, and I paid for it dearly when he did. “Secondly, you disrespected me last night and this morning by talking back and telling me ‘no.'”  He stopped talking all together and put his efforts into my spanking.  I managed not to cry, but I had a hard time keeping still and not crying out.  Finally, it stopped.  “Go back to your corner and kneel.”  I did, and fast, just to get away from his hand.  I even forgot my pants and panties on the floor next to the chair. 
Thank god it was over.  That was awful.  But at least I wasn’t going back to foster care.  It was over.  I knelt in my corner and relaxed.  I really wanted to cry, but I would wait until I got to my own bedroom for that.  I didn’t want to embarrass myself by crying in front of him like I had done the night before. 
I heard his voice again.  “Come here.”  Okay, I thought, the last little speech and we are done.  When I turned around, I froze.  What was he holding in his hand?  Was that a belt?  His belt?  “Let’s go, move it,” he said.
I walked over to him.  “What did you just get punished for?” I looked at him blankly.  What was he talking about?  Oh wait, okay he said something about…”Coming home late,” I mumbled.  “And what else?”  He crossed his arms and waited.  “Disrespecting you,” I mumbled even lower.  I felt about two inches tall.  I looked at the floor and fidgeted.
“And what else do we have to take care of today?” Now he was talking conversationally and pleasantly.  Seriously?
“Drinking.”  I wanted to melt into the floor.  My ears felt as hot as my ass.  That reminded me.  I looked around for my jeans and panties.  Where had they gone?
“And?”  He waited again.  And what?  Oh yeah.  “Lying to you.”  I never did tell him where I was.  How did he know I was lying?  My friends covered for me.  Who ratted?  I would kill her. 
Chris sighed.  He took me arm and guided me over the armchair.  I felt every muscle in my body tense up.  What was happening?  Suddenly ,I heard a whoosh and felt the belt and on my ass, hard.  I gasped.  It hurt more than I thought it would. I braced myself.  Nothing happend.
“Stand up, Andrea.”  I did, confused.  Was this it?  I searched his face and tried to read it.  His cold eyes were a little softer, and he started to speak.  “Do you understand why I am doing this?” 
“Because I messed up and don’t listen to you.”  That was an easy answer.  What a weird question.
“No.” His voice wasn’t cold anymore now either.  “I mean, yes, but Andrea, do you have any idea what can happen to a 15 year old girl who is drunk and dressed like a slut at three in the morning?”  I stiffened.  He hadn’t mentioned the dressed like a slut thing before. 
“I was careful.”  My voice was tiny and I am not sure if he heard me.  I was humiliated all over again. 
“It doesn’t matter how careful you are.  Things happen.  I don’t want to lose you.  You are all I have left.  So yes, I am doing this because you messed up and didn’t listen to me, but I am doing this because I want to keep you safe.  You might think I am being completely unfair, but really, what other choice do I have?”
I thought about that for a minute.  He tried the cool big brother I’m your friend thing, and that didn’t work.  He tried the grounding thing,and that didn’t work.  He tried the talking thing and that didn’t work.  He set up appointments with counselors that I didn’t go to and he even made plans with me that I didn’t show up for.  Oops.  I guess he was out of options. Damn it.  Now I felt even smaller.  I couldn’t say anything.  I looked at him for a second and then threw my arms around him.  I hugged him as tightly as I could.  I wanted him to feel how sorry I was and how much I understood what he meant and how I was going to try to be better.  And, of course, I cried into his shirt. 
I held on for a full minute before I let go.  His shirt was wet with my tears, but he never hugged me back.  That, to me, felt terrible, but I guess I deserved it.  I draped myself back over the chair and waited.  For a minute, nothing happened.  Then suddenly ,I felt the belt again and again.  And again.  Chris whipped my ass with what felt like all his strength, and by the time he was finished, I was sobbing so deeply that my body trembled.  I didn’t even notice that he was finished.  Finally, I felt his arms around me, holding me as tightly and gently.  It felt like he was saying, “I forgive you.  We can do this.”